"Of course, it is not possible to briefly summarize the destruction in Gaza. However, it is not acceptable to gloss over it, exclude death counts, and downplay the severity."
January 4, 2023
To:
Marlo Glass, Journalist, Ottawa Citizen
Nicole Feriancek, Editor-in-Chief, Ottawa Citizen
Dear Marlo Glass and Nicole Feriancek,
I’m writing in response to your recent article, “Noise bylaw tickets issued again during 12th weekend of pro-Palestinian rallies in Ottawa.'”
Overall, you do a good job of striking a balance in terms of statements from protesters and the city. The reader leaves with a solid sense of the dispute and how both parties feel. Many other articles about the tickets fail that basic standard.
Unfortunately, the conclusion of the article is more than inadequate. It reads:
The war triggered by a deadly Hamas attack on southern Israel on Oct. 7 has displaced large swaths of Gaza’s 2.3 million residents.
Israeli warplanes struck two urban refugee camps in central Gaza on Saturday, and United States President Joe Biden approved new weapons sales to Israel despite international calls for a cease-fire.
The United Nations Security Council has called for the unhindered delivery of humanitarian aid to Gaza, which has been blocked by long delays at two border crossings, ongoing fighting, Israeli airstrikes, repeated cuts in internet and phone services and more.
This section serves as the summary, for readers, of where Israel’s ongoing war on Gaza stands. We are not provided a death toll of Palestinians, only told that “large swaths” of “residents” have been “displaced.” This language profoundly downplays the situation in Gaza. More than 20,000 Palestinians have been killed. Most of the dead are women and children. Leading Israeli ministers are advocating for the near-total expulsion of Palestinians from Gaza. Leading human rights groups describe the situation as genocide. You mention two refugee camps that were attacked but don’t mention the vast destruction of Gaza, which is at scales new seen since World War II.
It's hard to describe how inadequate your conclusion is. I see the article comes with files from AP, so perhaps this is part of the issue. Nonetheless, the shortcomings of the ending constitute a stain on an otherwise decent article. Of course, it is not possible to briefly summarize the destruction in Gaza. However, it is not acceptable to gloss over it, exclude death counts, and downplay the severity.
Please update your article to include the death toll of Palestinians as well as more information about the well-documented destruction of Gaza by Israel.
Sincerely,
Jason Toney
Director of Media Advocacy, Canadians for Justice and Peace in the Middle East